The
Poetry Of Rusty Arquette
A
Footnote
to Our Youth
We were impulsive then
with no want of being locked indoors
while coached in some boring subject
bound by books
we skipped school
on the first warm day of spring
Pam and David, steadies
and he that best friend we all had
Cindy and I, flirts and lovers
a couple clowns lusting after life
four teens out to explore ourselves
to explore our world
to reclaim a long stretch
of empty beach
still a coolness to the breeze
left a fine moist blue haze
that clung to our skin
as we left our clothes in piles
laughing, to run naked in the sand
our senses alive with the sensation
passed from skin and eye to mind
facing sun and sky and pounding surf
alive with the tactile feel of nature
sharing these passing moments
strung together like pearls
worn with youthful abandon
hand in hand we ran the beach
childlike laughter rolling
above the noise of the breakers
we slowed to walk warm sands
our voices fell quiet
finally bringing us pause
as Cindy tugged at our hands
and turned to face the small circle
a tear tracing a path upon her cheek
uncharacteristically profound
for the silly blonde we loved
doe eyed, she said,
'We'll never see these days again'
we four stood in an embrace
pressed flesh to flesh
comforting our sweet Cindy
comforting ourselves
days short of graduation
knowing the truth in those words
we reluctantly were pushed
into unwanted tomorrows
leaving the simple circle of friends
as a footnote to our youth
not too many years later
I received word
Cindy lost a battle with cancer
gone too young
it reminded me of her words
and all I could think of
was that long afternoon on the beach
and how important
it was to count our youth filled days
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Arrangements
and Distractions
I balanced my checkbook…
paid some bills…
tossed out the short pencils
in the coffee cup…
put all the paper clips
in the shot glass next to it…
loaded paper in the printer…
arranged the six Happy Buddhas
below the computer screen…
dusted it while I was at it…
put the note pads in order by size…
cleaned up the address book
getting rid bits of paper
with clipped addresses…
put the scotch tape back…
wipe down the desktop…
slipped the phone back in its spot…
straightened the papers
left needing attention…
put the keyboard and mouse
back in their right spots…
sat back and in my chair…
thinking of you…
yet again…
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Janis
Lives
in Golden Gate Park
I took a melancholy ride again
back through the missing people
and lost places in my memory
those real and those imagined
I moved among fuzzy ghosts
kept frozen through the years
wondering just who I'd find
the cruel or well intentioned
This time it was mama Pearl
no mistaking the hat and shades,
and feather boa; still looked fine
dressed for minimal fan attention
She was there in the aisle at City Lights
searching the biographies on the shelf
as I grinned, sneaking up from behind,
looking like the quintessential pervert
I reached quickly with a free hand
and squeezed her unsuspecting ass
she laughed that laugh so fine
the sound ran chills up my spine
She spun around and hugged me
smiling, "Daddy, you still got it"
a line I'd heard a thousand times
now all but faded and forgotten
She found a bio there on Bessie
and of course mama had no cash,
she didn't need it then, why start now
so I got that baby-can-ya-help-me look
I paid the clerk and Pearl took my arm
she hummed a broken hearted blues
and we set off together toward the bay
as the day began to slowly disappear
Music came from apartments and cars
as we walked the rolling city streets
noting, none with a melody or soul
she groaned, "The life's gone, man"
I couldn't argue the lady's point
we'd held the funeral years before
but I said the blues were still alive
moving quietly through small towns
She snuggled close to avoid the chill
I told her of the Shepherds and Laings
that had listened and shaped it all anew
and the passing of the old blues masters
Lightnin', Wolf and Waters, all the best
Told her of players come and gone as well
Bloomfield, Hendrix, Vaughn, Big Mama
now all a part of "D'em Old Kozmic Blues"
We didn't stop walking till after dark
talked out, legs aching, we counted stars
watched the city flick on its mantle of lights
held hands beneath a San Franciscan night
The sound of distant church bells
chimed the approach of a new day
One that I would soon awake to
One that Pearl could never see
She pulled a bottle of Southern Comfort
from nowhere and took a long slow drink
then kissed my mouth both hard and hungry
I tasted comfort in the kiss and on her tongue
I whispered that I've always wondered
what if I'd been there when she'd fallen
to hold her and love her and keep her safe
another drink, another kiss, and that grin
It's a gnawing craziness, I know, I carried
it since '68
but I just had to let ya' know I've loved you, Pearl…
"Darlin' I know you love me; hell, it's why I'm here
but my time has gone and this isn't me anymore"
She stroked my face, laughed that heady laugh,
and Comfort in hand, turned and sauntered away
her voice was there, as she became vapor in the dark
"Tell'em Janis is alive and lives in Golden Gate Park"
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